Episode 8 | Inner Wisdom
Today’s episode is all about cultivating inner wisdom through a lot of the difficult experiences that we’ve had. I will be talking through examples in my own life and the lessons four I have learned along the way. I hope this episode resonates you and makes you feel less alone. Enjoy!
Listen to the full episode here.
There have been many experiences in my life where I have decided to take the blame and not listen to my inner wisdom. After reflecting on these past experiences (divorce, a horrible relationship, being shamed, etc), I noticed a few themes emerging. I would ignore my inner wisdom and deny what would have been right for me, in order to preserve a certain relationship. I wanted to avoid conflict. I thought keeping the peace was more important than listening to the wisdom inside of me.
Why wasn’t I listening to these thoughts? I wasn’t sure so of course, I set out to learn more. As I did so, I realized four major things that could help me down the road if I start listening to the voice that has my best intentions in mind.
So what did I learn? Read on, or listen to the episode here.
Lesson #1: People’s thoughts and feelings are their own
Instead of having my own back, I take ownership of people’s thoughts and feelings. I don’t advocate for myself.
When I was being criticized I often would then believe that I needed to improve or change myself instead of improving my ability to stand up for myself.
Lesson #2: In intense situations, my brain tends to shut down
When I encountered these situations (my ex-husband telling me I can’t be trusted with money, an old employee telling me that I didn’t know what I was doing, etc), my mind would go blank.
Because of the interrogation (rather than constructive conversations), my brain shuts down. I lose energy and my ability to process information in a neutral way.
Lesson #3: Rules of conduct apply to even tough conversations
The way feedback is delivered is important. Feedback is crucial but if it is delivered with the intention to shame or humiliate, it is not constructive.
I recognized that it is okay to remove myself from these situations and come back to the conversation when tensions are lower.
Lesson #4: Love yourself no matter what
This is the ultimate lesson.
If someone else believes that I am the root of their discomfort, it doesn’t mean that I need to turn against myself.
I can love myself when someone is interrogating or attacking me.
My goal has been to listen to the voice inside me that says things like, “It’s okay if they're disappointed in you.” Or, “Cancel your meetings and take a day off.”
Sometimes we quite the voice inside of us. When we do tune into our voice it might require us to change or take a risk. Our brain doesn’t like that. But I’m telling you that this kind of work is required if you want to make a true change in your life. Are you willing to listen to your inner voice?
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Want to connect more? Follow me on Instagram @stephanie_sheldon. I’d love to connect!
Interested in learning more about how to change your life and/or business? Check out my coaching offerings here.
Thank you for listening! I can’t wait to chat again next week.